A very tiny piece of Connor Mac Niall’s journal (written many, many years after the events of Ravenmarked and Bloodbonded):
It changes a man, this battle. War. It changes a man.
You know that growing up. I wasn’t a stranger to violence. I started hunting when I was . . . I don’t know. Three? Four? My father taught me to use a knife early, and I remember helping him with tanning. I brought down my first deer when I was seven. Taking the life of an animal wasn’t hard. It was necessary. Still, it took a long time to stop shaking after that kill. But no steak before or since has tasted so good.
It was always repugnant to my mother. She’s Sidh. She never understood why I needed meat. But the human side of me craved it. I couldn’t understand how they could go without it, the Sidh.
I fear I’m a great disappointment to my mother. (more…)
The last couple of weeks have been odd.
On the one hand, it’s been a very long time since I’ve been this frustrated, discouraged, and exhausted with my volunteer job. I was overwhelmed and frustrated in summer 2013 when I first took the job, but I expected it then. I mean, I was still in the midst of my long, dark tea-time of the soul (thanks, Douglas Adams, for that phrase; I use it often), and so pretty much everything was frustrating, overwhelming, discouraging, etc. But I got over that and had a pretty good couple of years… until recently. Let’s just say that it’s become crystal clear that it is time for me to step down as a leader. Either I am really not a good fit for this job, or else I’m just really, really tired. It’s probably a bit of both.
But on the other hand… I have experienced a new surge of encouragement from the world of Christian artists. (more…)
The last two weeks have just about killed me.
School is officially in session for all four kids. The youngest started on September 1, the freshman started on the 8th, and the junior and the 7th grader started on the 9th. And it’s been quite a ride so far. The oldest three went from a small private school to a large public high school and medium-sized public middle school. All the kid activities are in full swing, too. Lots of changes–lots of stress. We’re still working on settling everything down.
On top of those things, our freezer is dying, and the kids’ bathroom has a leak somewhere around the bathtub. We haven’t found it yet. I’d move, but the quality of the neighborhood has taken a nose dive, and I don’t see it improving any time soon. Plus, moving with four kids just really isn’t appealing at all.
But the biggest thing is that I seem to keep bumping up against conflict every time I turn around right now. (more…)